Wednesday, 9 April 2008

Need an Alibi?

I thought this was a joke at first but the following is from a real website offering you an alibi for everything from a doctor's excuse to take time off work to having an extra marital affair. The company can mimic the caller id to make your telephone appear as if it's coming from somewhere else or give you complete anonymity if you prefer. If you haven't worked for a while and need a bogus CV/resume filler they can sort you out (might need this myself!). There are many of these websites out there so I guess they must be doing business.

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Alibi Network is a cutting edge full service agency providing alibis and excuses for absences as well as assistance with a variety of sensitive issues. We view ourselves as professional advisors who understand our clients’ unique situations. We explore various approaches with our clients and implement the best solution based on each individual case. We understand your need for privacy and we are completely discreet and confidential. _________________________________________________________________

We all encounter sensitive situations in our life. These may include family problems, social issues, work or financial difficulties. When you don’t want to involve your close friends and relatives for privacy reasons it is time to contact Alibi Network. Let us be your Privacy Partners.

We Understand The Delicacy of Real World Personal relations and can help you solve any sensitive problems and situations resulting from them with a variety of discreet services we provide. Whether you are interested in a doctor's excuse or a virtual seminar in order to get away or need us to place a discreet phone call on your behalf, we'll provide the support you are looking for.

Having a Discreet Affair?
Married but looking? We invent, create and provide customized alibis and excuses for attached adults involved in discreet relationships or encounters.


Virtual Hotel Service
Toll free or local virtual hotel number answered by a virtual front desk clerk 24 hours a day. The operator will greet a caller with the appropriate hotel greeting message and will handle the call according to the instructions.


Worldwide Telephone and Fax Services
We will receive a phone call from anywhere in the world and discreetly route it to anybody, in any location, anywhere in the world with ANY number showing up on the caller id of the receiving party.


Handling of Business and Personal Sensitive Matters
Do you find yourself in a sensitive situation and you can not involve your friends or relatives to help you? Are you sure your business partner or vendor is trustworthy? We can help you solve your problems.


Pretend You Are Anywhere
We can send email from anywhere in the world from your own email account, backed up with your own international phone number of the hotel, friend or anybody else. Discrete and confidential.


Rescue Call Services
The phone call from us to communicate any information you desire or to help you escape any situations such as dull meetings, bad dates or other unnecessary commitments that need to be cut short or cancelled.


Virtual Doctor's Office / Doctor Excuses
Looking for a doctor's excuse to get away? Supported by the local virtual doctor's office phone number anywhere in the world? Your doctors excuses are only a click away.



Virtual Confirmations:
- E-tickets - Hotel Stays - Car Rentals - Seminars, Conferences, Classes - Job Interviews - Sporting Events - Outdoor Trips - Other Discrete Services and Events.


Virtual Seminar/Training:
We offer a solid and a carefully constructed 2 to 5 days alibi and excuse package for our clients who are comfortable with the idea of going to a training/seminar.


Virtual Buddy
We'll set you up with the phone number and a voice mail. Our Male / Female Specialist will act as your virtual buddy taking and placing phone calls.


Untraceable Phone Numbers
For a week, a month or a year. Receive and make calls discreetly from this number. Instant activation. Available in every major city in the U.S. and most cities worldwide.


Virtual Employment
Are you embarrassed to be unemployed? Do you have a critical life situation that requires you to have a job? Would you like to create an impression that you have your dream job? With your own virtual office, executive assistant and business cards?


Fake Novelties
Are you embarrassed to admit you missed the show? We provide fake tickets for past events, fake receipts, fake confirmations and many other novelty items for pranks and practical jokes


Discreet Shopping
allows our customers to acquire any products or services anywhere in the world and remain completely anonymous. We will purchase, wrap and ship to any location.


Virtual Business/Office Phone Number
With a greeting, voice mail and receptionist confirming your virtual presence.

Read More Here

6 comments:

Julia April 09, 2008 1:06 pm  

Brilliant. I forwarded this to my husband, and then realized maybe I should have kept it secret.

Baino April 09, 2008 4:04 pm  

Deliciously wicked. I can pretend I'm anywhere for $75! *considers next conspiratorial activity*

Shaunj April 10, 2008 10:38 am  

You did it 'cause you wanted
Alibi, alibi
And you took it
Cause you need it
Alibi, alibi

Quickroute April 10, 2008 4:50 pm  

Julia - I hope he did`n´t know about it already!!!

Baino - It´s a bargain alright!

Shaunj - Are you rapping?

Shaunj April 11, 2008 4:50 am  

no tis an Elvis C song. Sorry about that. thought you might find this interesting as you are in BA.

http://books.guardian.co.uk/departments/politicsphilosophyandsociety/story/0,,2272125,00.html

Quickroute April 11, 2008 5:32 pm  

Shaunj: Ah good ol' Elvis Costello - I can hum it now! - Can't make out that link as it too long for the comments section - if you want a techie lesson you can see how to put it in a link Here

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