Wednesday, 17 December 2008

Attack of the Killer Snails

There's a well known bit of rivalry between city and rural folk in Ireland. I myself hail from the 'big smoke' aka Dublin city but both my parents are from the country (County Mayo and Westmeath). Dubliners are referred to as 'Jackeens' by rural folk and we call rural folk 'Culchies'. Both are derogatory terms with little actual meaning.

As a city slicker, I thoroughly enjoyed the childhood summer vacations in my Mums neck of the woods (Lecanvey, Murrisk, County Mayo). People often think of a city as dangerous but the countryside is not without it's own dangers, especially for a child from the city.

The most terrifying experience I remember as a wee lad of about 8 years old, was with snails and slugs. I was walking thru a wet field when I suddenly became aware of the huge amount of slugs and snails all around me. I froze dead in my tracks and I felt like I was completely surrounded by the slimy monsters. To me it seemed like they were slowly and collectively advancing upon me, to eat me or worse. I stood there for a good ten minutes screaming at the top of my lungs before someone rescued me.

Killer Snails

It's true in hindsight, they didn't advance very far in that ten minutes and I also seem to remember a good deal of ridicule about the whole affair afterward but at the time I practically sh!t my pants!

Tell me now - What were/are YOU afraid of?

Tags: ..Attack of the Killer Snails..

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nick December 18, 2008 12:57 am  

Cockroaches. I'm terrified of the little buggers. Very glad I don't live in one of those places where there're armies of them. I used to work in a bookshop where they were always crawling around the basement. Gave me the heeby jeebies.

Robot Nine December 18, 2008 1:33 am  

Spiders. Give me a snake, but a spider just creeps the hell out of me.

I had a book of short stories once, can't remember the title but it was cool. In one story a guy raised snals, and they were multiplying out of control, until one day he had to force his way in. The door slid shut, covered with thousands of snails, hidden. He became panicked, delirious, unable to find up, down, the door, in a ball of snails, and there he met his end. WOW!

Another in the book had a prisoner put in a cell that was carved into a giant horizontal wheel of stone, that was inside a mountain. There were hidden slots that food and water were passed in, and all day every day he and the thousands of others locked in the cells had to push to move the wheel. The harder and longer thay push, the shorter the sentence they serve. Are the other's carrying their wight? Do you push or ride out the time? Creepy.

Both were well written and cool.

Robot Nine

Anonymous,  December 18, 2008 2:26 am  

as a kid in the countryside electric fences were my biggest fear!

Thriftcriminal December 18, 2008 5:19 am  

The pedestrian part of the Clifton Suspension Bridge (go Brunell!).

It was one of those steel mesh affairs, completely safe but because I could se ALL the way down to the water I was terrified that I would somehow fall through the small holes and plunge to my doom.

Hey, I was 3.

Baino December 18, 2008 5:27 am  

Wow I'm way older than you lot and your long term memory is much better than mine. Apparently I used to literally crawl under the carpet on Guy Fawkes night but I don't remember. I do remember being terrified of the reflection of shiny objects dancing on the wall or ceiling. These days, snakes, spiders, lizards are a way of life . . can't stand bull ants. Aggressive little shits and huge and they hurt when they bite! PS: Get a Blue Tongue Lizard, they eat slugs and snails!

Broke But Still Drinking December 18, 2008 7:53 am  

While I was in Ireland, I was told the country has no snakes. I think this is a complete lie. Even if the country began with no snakes, are you telling me nobody has ever sneaked one into the country? Surely the snake could survive by eating snails.

Anonymous,  December 18, 2008 11:45 am  

Rats, violence and violent people, and I remember I used to scare the crap outta myself in bed as a kid by projecing a torch on the ceiling and then slowing moving my hand into the beam. Felt like some giant was going to pick me up. Shudder to think about it.

Quickroute December 18, 2008 12:03 pm  

@ Nick: Yes I hate those things - they have huge roaches in Oz - I would hear them at night and turn on the light to see them scurrying for a corner

@ Robot: Those are cool stories. I wouldn't be able to sleep after reading those.

@ Conortje: I got zapped by one of those once - once bitten twice shy!

@ Thrifty: I'm afraid of heights so can relate

@ Baino: I think I'd be more afraid of the lizard!

@ Broke: St Patrick cast them out or so the story goes. I believe a few pet snakes have escaped into the Irish countryside but usually die from the cold :-((

@ Anony: I remember that torch trick too but couldn't resist trying it over and over

Xbox4NappyRash December 18, 2008 1:21 pm  

The number 9. I hate the feckin thing.

King of New York Hacks December 18, 2008 1:47 pm  

I lived about 100 yards from the ocean and after seeing the movie JAWS believed that a killer shark could tunnel its way to my backyard pool and kill me. Yes...I am an idiot.

Fida December 18, 2008 10:31 pm  

Sankes. And hand knitted, scratchy woollen tights – they’re worse than a thousand ants crawling up your legs! Or rats

Megan December 19, 2008 12:49 am  

I'm with Nick.

Never forget waking up once with one of those cock-a-roaches 2 inches from my nose, feelers swirling about as it decided whether or not to eat my face!

Plus, they're wicked fast.

iWalk December 19, 2008 8:58 am  

I am afraid many things, such as snakes, rats, bats, bees, blackbeetles.....

I still could remember I was so scared by a goose when I was 5 years old.

Quickroute December 19, 2008 4:55 pm  

@ Cest La Craic: I guess there's more to that story

@ Xbox: as in the bus?

@ King of NY: ah yes - I didn't take a bath for a week after Jaws

@ Fida: rats - I hate those too - saw a movie where they killed people and ate them!

@ Megan: Roaches sure are unpopular and practically indestructible

@ iwalk: Geese are extremely aggressive - I remember an encounter which was a little scary

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