The Old Bag

Once upon a time in a far off land called Yankieville there lived a happy princess with a lot of clothes, bags and shoes.  The happy princess was married to an Irish git who liked to travel. The Irish git and his happy princess decided to move from Yankieville to another far off land called Lagerloutville. The Irish git tried hard to impress upon his happy princess the need to ship most of her belongings because flying with excess baggage is only for silly billies or people with endless wallets. The happy princess didn't listen however and when it came time to check in for the flight to Lagerloutville she had 5 super size bags each weighing in excess of 30kgs (66Lbs). By some sheer fluke or 'Luck o' the Irish', the check-in attendant, an Irish lass from Aer Lingus waived the excess fees (which would have kept the Icelandic economy afloat) as there had been a delay processing the check-in.

A few years later the Irish git and his happy princess decided to move from Lagerloutville to Maradonaland.  Once again the Irish git impressed upon his happy princess the need to ship most of her belongings because flying with excess baggage is only for silly billies or people with endless wallets and 'Luck o' the Irish' doesn't last forever.

Once again the happy princess didn't listen however and when it came time to check in for the flight to Maradonaland she had 2 super size bags each weighing in excess of 26kgs (57Lbs). This time however the little leprechaun luck was not on her side and the extra mean national airline of Maradonaland only allowed 1 checked in bag and wanted to charge her by the kilo for her excess baggage to the tune of u$d850.  The happy princess was not too happy and the Irish git was McFu$kin' livid but by a stroke of resourcefulness the happy princess was able to offload the excess luggage at the airport to some poor gopher to be couriered to Maradonaland by some other gopher at some later point.

A couple of years later the Irish git and his happy princess decided to try and rejoin the rat race and moved from Maradonaland to Honkietown.  The Irish git travelled there first and the happy princess followed on later.  This time around the Irish git decided that shipping stuff around the world is only for silly billies or people with endless wallets and 2 suitcases of clothes is plenty for anyone given the uncertainty of the GFC (Global Financial Crisis) and what not.  The happy princess had 2 months to prepare her bags and eventually she was reunited with the Irish git in Honkietown.

It wasn't long however until the happy princess realised she had not packed very carefully and she didn't have exactly what she really needed for Honkietown so she enlisted her sister and her parents to pack another bag and send it with a friend who was travelling from Maradonaland to Lagerloutville whereupon it could be delivered to another friend who was travelling to Honkietown.  Her parents dutifully obliged and delivered a bag of clothes to a friend of the happy princess who brought the bag to Lagerloutville whereupon another good friend met that friend at a train station and collected the bag and soon after delivered said bag to the Irish gits brother in Lagerloutville.  Unfortunately the baggage allowance fiasco once again raised its ugly head while the bag was supposed to be shuttled to Honkietown and the bag was eventually left in limbo and gathering dust in the Irish gits brothers apartment in Lagerloutville.

The Irish gits brother just so happened to visit Honkietown on a business trip this evening whereupon the said bag was finally delivered to the happy princess (albeit 10 months later than intended) who was shall we say .....happy!  The Irish git is also happy because he will not have to hear about the McFu$kin' bag ever again! - and they all lived happily ever after without carrying around any baggage - THE END!

On behalf of the happy princess, I would like to thank the following:

GOD

The Academy

Silvia & Osvaldo

Gabi
Ian

Patricia & Alfonso

Luciana

Ana

Soledad

The check-in staff and baggage handlers of multiple airlines

The taxi and mini cab cab drivers who couriered the bag back and forth and back again

....and the other 200 cast and crew behind the scenes who made this dream a reality

Disclaimer: This story is based solely on fact. Any resemblance to persons not alive and kicking is purely unintentional.

Tags: ..The Old Bag..

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