Take a HIKE you Heathen!

Me: Bless me Father for I have sinned.  It’s been 2 years since my last hike


Priest: It’s not a sin if you don’t go hiking my son

Me: Tiz a sin to me Father. Tiz a feckin’ terrible mortal sin to be sure. I used to roam the hills of Hong Kong on a weekly basis. I've strayed from the path.


Priest: How long has it been since your last confession my son? 


Me: Jaezuz Father - did ya not hear me confess a minute ago?


Priest: No, I mean when was the time before this?


Me: Let me think, ah yes, do ya remember the movie - Debbie Does Dallas? After that I think. {That was a little white lie – I’d confessed more recently}


Priest: Yes, that was one of my all time favs. Has it really been that long?


Me: I’m afraid so


Priest: So besides not hiking for 2 years do you have anything else you want to confess my son?


Me: Well, I took the name of the Lord my God - Steve Jobs in vain after Apple released the disappointing iPhone 4S


Priest: I see – anything else?


Me: No – that’s it – what’s my penance?


Priest: Say two Hail Mary’s and switch to an Android phone for 4 weeks and get back out on the hiking trails – pronto! – Go in peace my son and may God have mercy on you – ya heathen little fecker!
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